How do I stop being emotionally defensive?

Here are 6 strategies to manage your defensive impulses:

1. Know your triggers and anticipate them.
2. Give it a name.
3. Assume good intentions.
4. Don’t take it personally.
5. Adopt a growth mindset.
6. Exercise self-compassion.

What causes a person to be overly defensive?

People can be defensive because they struggle with their self-esteem. It’s difficult to handle criticism when you already feel bad about yourself. It makes you feel even worse. Then, there are defensive people that struggle with mental health challenges such as Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

What does it mean to be emotionally defensive?

Generally, when people talk about someone becoming defensive in the context of a conversation, they are meaning that that someone is engaging in emotionally defensive maneuvers designed to ward off their having to experience some unwanted feeling or admit responsibility for some disowned act.

How do you manage defensive behavior?

Here are several steps that can help you become more emotionally intelligent when dealing with defensive people:

1. Refrain from reacting defensively.
2. Shift your focus to the other person.
3. Ask questions until you understand them.
4. Move toward a resolution.

How do I become a less defensive person?

11 Tips For Being (And Feeling) Less Defensive

1. Think Before You Respond.
2. Manage Your Stress.
3. Get Better At Listening.
4. Take Some Deep Breaths.
5. Get To Know Yourself Better.
6. Don’t Let Yourself Interrupt.
7. Know When You’re Being Defensive.
8. View Things From Different Perspectives.

How can I stop feeling personally attacked?

Here are six steps to help you not take personal attacks personally.

1. Accept the Anger. When youve just been attacked, anger is a normal response.
2. Confront the Shame. On some level, we all feel a sense of shame when attacked.
3. Detach From The Need.
4. Revisit Your Values.
5. Develop Agency.
6. Repeat.

How do you help a defensive person?

Do not mirror the defensive person’s anger. Keep your voice even and steady. Stay calm! This may be the most important advice I can offer. As difficult as it is to stay calm when we feel unfairly attacked, it is absolutely critical not to meet the defensive person’s anger with more anger.

How do you diffuse defensiveness?

Here are some tips for effectively managing an individual’s emotional reaction and defusing their defensiveness in the moment.

1. Notice Behavior.
2. Remain Calm.
3. Use a reflecting statement.
4. Follow with a question.
5. Ask questions.
6. Do something physical.
7. Get the person to tell their story.
8. Identify what they value.

How can we stop defensive communication?

Ways To Communicate Without Being Defensive

1. Be Secure In Who You Are. You’re less likely to get defensive or hurt over something when you know for sure that it’s not true.
2. Stop Retaliating & Genuinely Listen.
3. Use “I” Statements.
4. Think Long-Term Instead Of Short-Term.
5. Learn How To Receive Criticism.
6. It’s OK To Be Wrong.

What are defensive behaviors?

Defensive behaviors are a group of evolved responses to threat. They include flight, freezing, defensive threat, defensive attack, and risk assessment. The type of defensive behavior elicited in a particular situation depends on features of both the threat and the situation.

How do you communicate well without being defensive?

Below are a few ways to communicate well without being defensive. This can take some time to adjust to, but once you learn how to stop putting your guard up, you can learn how to feel comfortable having with others without completely breaking down. 1. Be Secure In Who You Are

How can I stop feeling defensive when I get criticism?

Remembering our firmest beliefs and passions can make us feel less defensive. Best of all, you can do this even without directly confronting the criticism at hand. So, for example, if you’re feeling defensive after a not-so-stellar work review, forget about frantically rehashing all your past workplace triumphs.

How do you deal with defensiveness at work?

Try avoiding defensiveness by remembering you have nothing to be defensive about. Do the best you can with the information and resources you have available, and be confident that your work is the best you can provide. If things outside of your control affect your work, try not to let this affect you.

How do you respond when someone is defensive about something?

Learn graceful ways to cope with feeling defensive. Say more about that.” And then, use their airtime to take a few slow breaths and consider how you’d like to respond. Alternatively, don’t be afraid to stay momentarily silent. A slightly awkward pause buys you time and, as a bonus, throws them off their game.